We've All Got an Itch to Scratch

Today, President Obama has unveiled a plan calling for the elimination of corporate tax loopholes and tax cuts.  Clearly this is a savvy political move before the election, especially considering many of his possible opponents are advocating similar reductions.

Although we've now experienced two consecutive months of employment gains--a reduction in new unemployment claims--this should not mean we should take our eye off of the problem of unemployment.  Despite a decrease in new claims, we need to ask for statistics about those who are no longer being counted; those who have exhausted their 99 weeks of UI benefits and are no longer a part of official numbers should still be of grave concern for the well being of our nation. We may be officially hovering around 8.5%, but the number is likely much higher.  Millions of Americans are still trying to figure out how to feed themselves; every day they don't work is another day further from landing employment and the longer one is unemployed, the less likely an employer will be to hire that individual.

What are we going to do to turn around this crisis?  In my previous post, I advocated for hiring managers to  take a chance on the unemployed; I even challenged the President to renew the tax cuts he once gave to employers for hiring an individual unemployed longer than eight months.

The Dow is flirting with 13,000, higher than before the Great Recession and clearly much higher than during the Clinton years of prosperity.  Admittedly, I'm not an economist, but as an average guy on Main Street, I have to wonder how the Dow is doing so well but millions of people like me are not.

It's time to play hardball (and not with Chris Matthews); a good old game of "I'll scratch your back, if you scratch mine."  Instead of simply cutting corporate tax rates for good Presidential PR during an election year, we should be calling for a more comprehensive plan.  If we, the tax payers, are going to scratch the back of corporations by taking on more of the burden they will NOT be paying, they need to scratch ours.

An illustration:  Company ABC will receive a tax credit for every long-term unemployed American hired.  Once the company hires more than X number (predetermined number which can be a fixed number, say 10 or scaled to the size of the business) of the long-term unemployed, they will automatically receive a reduction in their effective rate, dropping it to 25% (the rate being floated as acceptable).

Of course, we would require some sort of mechanism to avoid game players who want to hire and fire, just to reap the benefit of a tax cut.

Let's face it, in many ways, this is much ado about nothing. There are myriad of reports about the number of corporations who are skirting all tax liabilities anyway.  That said, tax cuts are not just a gift that is given because you clamor loud enough and threaten votes. There are roads to upkeep (that facilitate the transport business goods), bridges to maintain, disabled veterans to support and many other necessities to which we, as a country, must contribute to in order to maintain prosperity.  We'll all in this together!

This plan is comprehensive and one from which everyone benefits:  The President gets points with voters for implementing a jobs creation program; the President also garners points with the business community for finding ways to cut taxes; Congress gets points for working together to help both Wall Street and Main Street; Americans win by getting back to work; Business wins by obtaining tax cuts and consumers who will begin spending again.

Cross posted from The HuffPo

Take a Chance on the Unemployed

The results of a United Technologies/National Journal Congressional Connection poll were just released and they are surprising to read.  Americans appear to have mixed thoughts about helping their fellow Americans. For a country that prides itself on its generosity, this survey may indicate how secretly selfish we may be.  If a discussion is to continue about the future of a social safety net, there must also be a discussion about what to do with those utilizing that safety net.  It’s time to talk about hiring the unemployed.

Let’s face it; hiring any new employee is always risky.  A candidate can tell you anything she wants as to why she is leaving her current organization (no room for growth, seeking more challenging work, etc.) in an effort to shed the best light on herself.  That’s obvious.  Yet, for all you know, her boss was on the verge of firing her for a consistent lack of productivity.  Although your organization tries to establish a process to mitigate hiring risks, it’s never a perfect formula and your process may likely never uncover that she was a poor performer, but you’ll hire her anyway because of her eager attitude and impressive titles.

If the circular file is not an official part of the selection process for unemployed resumes, being unemployed surely holds a negative bias in our collective brains.  It is often equated to being lazy, lacking drive or having a preference to ‘mooch’ off the system.  These are just a few characterizations and judging by the reaction of the audience at Republican debates in response to jabs by the candidates at the unemployed, many 

Americans agree with them. 

It’s time to throw out the stereotypes!

Today’s “unemployed generation” is NOT lazy.  It’s frustrating to hear those who talk about a friend of a friend who once “loved being unemployed for 8 months.” I don’t love it and reading stories like these lead me to believe there are millions of others who don’t either.  I, like the millions of others, have gone from a credit score in the 800s to complete ruin through bankruptcy and foreclosure.  We have applied to the online ads, attended the networking events, used social media and crafted multiple iterations of our resume based on each new blogger’s opinion.  There are even those of us attempting to gain additional skills.  We’re eager and ready to get back to work.

I can attest first-hand to the determination of the unemployed as a participant in the Chicago Career Tech program—a retraining program that includes both classroom training and hands-on learning experience, initiated by former Mayor Richard M. Daley and supported by the business and non-profit communities of Chicago.  My colleagues in this program are just like me and we all hang our hopes to  this program to give us the valuable skills needed to meet the demand of today’s workforce.

At first we were encouraged by the words of Shelley Stern, Citizenship Director for the Microsoft Corporation and Chair of the CCT Board of Directors, who recounted how CCT was born out of a realization by the business community that many jobs, including at Microsoft, were going unfilled over the past few years, despite high unemployment.  This was not due to a lack of labor, clearly, but rather a lack of necessary skills on the part of that unemployed labor.  This program seeks to supplement the already valuable skills possessed by the unemployed for high-demand industries.

Despite the efforts of CCT and our new skills obtained, we continue to find it difficult to land a position.  The rejection continues for a lot of previous participants and despair is setting in.  We ARE trying and we ARE being interviewed, but we continue to be told that we do not have enough or the “right” experience.

Instead of a discussion about removing or reducing the social safety net, thereby creating a deeper problem, let’s talk about how we all can help Americans get back to work.

Here are my challenges:  First, I challenge the President and Congress to re-enact the tax cuts to businesses for hiring the unemployed. Although we are no longer in an official Recession, there are millions of Americans who have been unemployed longer than 8 months.  That’s an awfully long time to go without work when there are bills to pay and mouths to feed.  This may help alleviate long-term joblessness.  If it doesn’t, businesses can no longer complain that they pay too much in taxes, if they pay them at all.

Next, I challenge the Republican nominees to do more than talk.  They are out there each day shaking hands with the unemployed.  Has one of them offered to put them in contact with their influential friends who are likely to be hiring managers with open positions?  If they want us to vote for them and believe they are the one to get the country back to work, start showing us you have experience doing it.

Third, I challenge business owners, HR managers, hiring managers and decision-makers to re-think the old notion that someone who has been unemployed is lazy or unproductive.  Take the risk; you may be pleasantly surprised with the results!

Finally, I challenge all Americans to help their fellow unemployed American.  Patriotism isn’t just putting up a flag on holidays and singing the National Anthem at sporting events. Patriotism is also supporting your fellow citizen.  .  FDR wrote: "In our personal ambitions we are individualists. But in our seeking for economic and political progress as a nation, we all go up or else all go down as one people. "

President George W. Bush was criticized for not asking Americans to participate in the “war effort.”  So here’s how you can participate in the “unemployment effort:” Check your company’s website to find out what positions are available.  Post them to Facebook or Twitter (use #jobs, for example).  Forward replies to your HR department. This is just one of many examples easily implemented and that helps move us all forward together.

Help a person, help a family, help the country; gamble on the Unemployed!

Visit Del's website for more information about Reframe Shame.

National Mortgage Settlement Already a #Fail

Attorneys General across the country held press conferences this morning to boast their 'victory' against the banks, having come to a settlement called the National Mortgage Settlement.  If you haven't heard, it is an agreement by the 5 big mortgage loan servicers--JP Morgan Chase, Citi, Wells Fargo, Bank of America and Ally/GMAC--and the government, which requires the former to pay damages for practices that violated the law and caused the housing bubble burst.  You can find out more information here.

Only hours into the announcement and it appears to be another complete failure, much like the Making Homes Affordable Program from 2009.  I've contacted Chase, as outlined by the NMS website, on three occasions today and none of their representatives have any idea what I'm referring to or what to do.  They are giving me information about my foreclosed property that has nothing to do with the NMS process.  One referred me to their lawyer's office, who also has ZERO clue about this settlement.

So what's going on here?  It looks like another complete failure by both government and the banks.  We always hear the business community tell us that capitalism works and is so great because private industry can do things better and more efficiently than government.  Oh yeah?  Then why is the government making an announcement about an agreement 5 private banks made and yet the banks have no clue about it?  I've worked in a call center before; I've even worked for a banking call center.  When big news is being released, the call center is notified a day or two ahead of time in order to prepare for possible questions and responses.  That would be an efficient business model in my opinion.

It's beginning to look like another case of the run-around, whereby the government gets positive PR out of the housing crisis by appearing 'tough' against the banks.  The banks get positive press out of it because they 'settled' as opposed to getting dragged into court and 'forced' to pay out for their violations of the law.  Good PR for everyone, but empty promises for the average consumer.

It's only day one, but this is already sounding a lot like my experience with the Making Homes Affordable Program, which we all know was a failure!


As a post script, before you comment on this blog about people shouldn't own homes if they can't afford it--like this guy--go back and read my story.  I bought the place with a very well paid job and a lot of money in savings in addition to perfect, pristine credit (in the 800s).  The reason I could no longer afford my mortgage was NOT a result of overextending myself, it was a result of a collapsed economy that prevented me from finding work.  This was also the case for millions of others in America.

Radio Appearance Cancelled

Upon further review of radio talk show host Dom Giordano and his style, I have cancelled my appearance on his show.  I have no interest in being part of a show that calls people idiots nearly a half-dozen times within the first 3 minutes of the show.  It's childish behavior that doesn't help our our fellow Americans who have hit hard times move forward to a more positive place.

He has categorized me as a "leader" of the OWS movement and that I have been criticizing him all over the internet.  First, I never claimed to be a "leader" of the OWS movement.  Second, I haven't been criticizing him all over the internet.  I posted one post in response to something he posted.  What's more, he has categorized my letter as me stating that it was intended to say I can't be successful because of the system.  Once again, that was NOT what I said. 

This is the exact reason why I chose not to be on his show today.  He's looking to only use hyperbolic language, contort words, name call and magnify silly one-off situations to categorize an entire group of people.  Dom should try reading through what people are really going through before criticizing them!!

I initially thought he wanted to talk about the fact that I'm trying to be successful by starting my own business and speaking to people across the country about moving past tough times.  I call this Reframe Shame because shame is what many people feel today as a result of the tough economy.

Shame is a learned emotion.  Think about children...they pick their nose in public or say any number of "embarrassing" things for which their parents correct them: the beginnings of the shame.

As adults, we have cultural cues that lead us to certain emotions and judgements.  In particular, this tough economy has created a lot of shame for people, whether they are going through unemployment, rejection, foreclosure, bankruptcy or any number of other situations.  A lot of people are experiencing these events through no fault of their own.  People who have followed the rules all their lives, paid their bills on time and so on and have fallen on tough time.

Unfortunately, shame is a tricky emotion.  Shame makes people close in on themselves; it's isolating and debilitating.  We have people in our country committing suicide because they don't see hope or a way out of this challenging time.   They have worked hard all of their life and played by the rules and now they've hit a very difficult rough patch.  Instead of criticizing them or calling them names like Dom, I'm trying to find a positive approach to getting people to move ahead to find success again.

Oh...and I won't even address his ridiculousness about bankruptcy.  If you want to know more, book me to speak at your next keynote event!

And the Hits Just Keep on Coming...

If you've been keeping up with my story, I left off discussing the beginning of the end for my condo.

With my plea for assistance rejected by the bank and the funds in my savings account approaching zero, I had to think of Plan C: What should I now do with my mortgage?  Short-sale?  Foreclosure?  These terms both carry such negative connotations and I've never been accustomed to NOT paying my bills.  The anxiety grew within me.

After researching my options of short-sale, foreclosure or bankruptcy, I decided that my best course of action would be a short sale.  Sure, my perfect credit would take a hit, but I'd be able to get the burden out from under me and I'd help the bank recoup most of the loan.

It was a big surprise that within the first 4 days of putting my place on the market, we had not one, but two offers.  The second buyer knew we had another offer coming in so they even bid ABOVE the listing price!  This was great.  The bank would be thrilled not to lose so much!

Weeks went by and from all indications, everything looked like it would work out fine.  At the last minute, however, the Loss/Mitigation department contacted me to inform me that they were willing to approve the short sale, but would still sue me for the difference.

Huh?  That's not a short sale.  In a short sale, everyone walks away a bit bruised and that meant that the bank was going to lose a bit of their money and so would I, along with my credit.

Now this is where critics of my story lament about how I had a contract with the bank and should pay the bill for which I signed my name.  Normally, I'm all for people paying their bills as promised, but there are times when people just can't.  When the well is dry, there won't be any water to drink.  So if you want to scream at me over and over in the comment section about what a terrible person I am, I've already heard it....and I'm already over it!

But I digress...we'll discuss this topic in more detail in a later post.  Back to the story.

photographer unknown

I told Hope, my friendly (not) Loss/Mitigation Rep, that this was not a short sale.  She laid down the law and I could either accept it or not.  So, I told her no.  I asked her how it made sense from a "mitigating your loss" prospective to now put me in the position to allow the place to go into foreclosure and file for bankruptcy on it.  They had an amazing offer on the table, especially considering the market at the time.  I asked how it made sense on her end to force my next move, foreclosure.  Since I was still unemployed, I would be allowed to continue living there until the foreclosure process was over (typically 15 months).  That meant at least 15 months without a mortgage payment for them, PLUS they would be responsible for property taxes.   What's more is that they would have to price the place WAY below market value as a foreclosed property, thereby losing even more money.  Pretty insane, right?  Remember, they had an amazing offer on the table that only had them losing about $45,000.

Hope then said to me "Well, you don't understand how the system works.  We'll just bundle it with other loans and sell it on the open market, making more money."  I stopped in my tracks!  I was flabbergasted!  I challenged her with "Are you telling me that you continue to use the same toxic practices that put us in this mess in the first place?"  Her response, without any shame was "Yes!"

Once again, if you feel compelled to criticize me for my actions, please re-read the paragraph above.  A financial industry that created this mess by selling toxic loans on the market, thereby creating a huge economic mess around the world, admitted to me that they were continuing these practices, despite the terrible press in the news about it! 

So that's what happened.  I called off the short sale and met with an attorney to begin the foreclosure and bankruptcy process.

Reframe Shame Message Goes "On The Air"

The speed of Social Media has come whizzing by my door so I'm using another post to interrupt my story and tell you about an upcoming event.

I will be on with conservative radio talk show host Dom Giordano, Friday October 14, 2011 at 9:05am (central). 

How did this come about?  Yesterday I received a message from a friend who was furious about photo (see right) she saw going viral on Facebook.  In a nutshell, this is one of many examples from a group calling themselves "The other 53%," a backlash group responding to the recent Occupy Wall Street protesters, who refer to themselves as "The 99%."

Dom posted this on his Facebook page with the comment on "This is the youth we can believe in."

Reading this and other examples from this "53%" group began to make me think about my message of Reframe Shame®.  There are many letters similar to this one calling fellow Americans names like "Lazy" and a "mooch" among others. 

I decided to write my own message and share it with Dom on his Twitter account.  His producer says he liked what I had to say and wants me on the show.  However, after listening to his show today on the topic, I'm a little skeptical about how much he truly "liked" it.  It'll be an interesting discussion.

The font is a little difficult to read, so I will reprint it below:

"I am 34 yrs old & played by the rules all my life. I have worked since the age of 14. I come from a lower-middle class family, obtained a Master’s degree, lived abroad, owned my own MODEST condo, had a $72,000/yr salary, paid my bills on time, had very low credit card debt, a decent savings account and PERFECT credit in the 800s!

Thanks to the FAT CATS on wall street who played casino with the economy and our LAZY, GREEDY politicians, our economy tanked.  I spent 22 months unemployed, blew thru my savings to pay the mortgage.  After that was gone, I had to let it go into foreclosure and eventually file for bankruptcy on it (not CC debt).  My credit is now screwed.  After 22 months, I landed a great job, but due to the continued lousy economy & poor financial management of the greedy heads of the organization, I lost my job again after only 6 short months there.

STOP telling us to quit whining!  Stop telling us we’re lazy!  Stop telling us we should take a minimum wage job!  That’s not why we went to college.  We were told college was our ticket to success & stability.  Instead of calling us names & criticizing us, why not put your patriotism to use & reach out your hand to your fellow American?  Attend a networking event in your area & bring your company’s list of current openings; help someone get an “in” in your company. How about joining JobAngels or another online network to help the unemployed?

Do you really think I (and others) enjoy the $18,000/yr unemployment benefits over my previous $72,000 salary?  Get real!

If you don’t think you’re part of the 99% today, watch out!  You could become one at any moment. Pink slips continue to go out everyday.  YOU could be next!"

 


Tune in....

Today's Reframe: Protests and Working Together

Now that the Occupy Wall Street movement has taken off and is garnering huge media attention, the push back has begun.  In fact, it was announced today that a conservative group is trying to counter the OWS movement with a "We're the 53%" movement.

What's interesting about this and other counter-movements and criticism is that they fail to see that they have more in common with the OWS protestors than they think.  Unfortunately, they are blinded and brainwashed by the typical THIS vs. THAT mentality we have been subjected to over the past few decades.

Huh?

The prevailing thought is that these OWS protesters are young and liberal.  Because the media reports it that way, the standard response is for conservatives to say the whole thing is hogwash and dismiss it.  This was not dissimilar from the Tea Party movement and how liberals reacted.  Although you may not have liked the ideas coming from the Tea Party, you had to give them credit for taking on the establishment and making themselves heard.

Now, look a little closer at the demographics from ANY news story about the OWS protests and you'll see that participants are of all ages, races and colors.  I've even seen reports that some identify themselves as Tea Partiers, others as liberals and progressives and yet others and Democrats and Republicans.

Nevermind that craziness, however, we have to paint this picture as us vs. them!

It's also become the standard mentality in the US that protesters are "crazy" and "radical."  It wasn't too long ago in our history that people took to the streets the way they do in Europe, Asia and South America.  Remember fighting for Women's Suffrage?  How about more recently with the Civil Rights protests?

Sadly, all that protesting got in the way of other interests of the wealthy, so protesters have been branded with negative connotations ever since.  Group think helps to quell large outbursts like we see in France or other countries where the right to protest is still sacred.    But I digress...

Luckily for America, those participating in the OWS events are from all walks of life.  And THAT is the power of this movement.  The Tea Partiers and Progressives disagree on many topics, but they agree that the greed and excess--both in government and private enterprise--at the expense of the average American has hit a tipping point and they are going to fight against it...together!  Indeed, it'll be a great moment for Democracy if these two groups can work together to make REAL, powerful change.

For those still confused about what "these people" are out there doing, I'd like to break things down very simply.  A lot of cliches and hyperbolic expressions have been thrown out into the discussion; the result is a message that begins to lose its power and meaning.   Here's my simple description of the matter at hand:

• Business 101 class teaches that the sole responsibilities of a corporation are to make a profit and protect the interests of its shareholders.

• Government 101 class teaches that our Government is "of the People, by the People, for the People." Our Constitution begins with "We the People..."  Using the word "People" so much seems to make it pretty clear where the focus should be.
  

Political campaigns are increasingly funded by corporations; Money flows en masse from private enterprise to political leaders.  Given the two bullet statements above, it appears that those elected to political office (ie: Government) now look to protect their interests:  Corporations.  Corporations are the "shareholders" of elected officials.  

Throughout the history of the US, we can find many illustrations of leaders who believed the People matter.  They also believed corporations had their place in our society.  For example, Woodrow Wilson said:

"America was established not to create wealth, but to realize a vision, to realize an ideal:  to discover and maintain liberty among men." (and women, too, of course!)

Theodore Roosevelt said:

"Our aim is not to do away with corporations; on the contrary, these big aggregations are an inevitable development of modern industrialism, and the effort to destroy them would be futile unless accomplished in ways that would work the utmost mischief to the entire body politic. We can do nothing of good in the way of regulating and supervising these corporations until we fix clearly in our minds that we are not attacking the corporations, but endeavoring to do away with any evil in them. We are not hostile to them; we are merely determined that they shall be so handled as to subserve the public good. We draw the line against misconduct, not against wealth."

 

I truly believe everyone has an interest in this movement, regardless of political affiliation.  There are so many common interests here for Progressives, Tea Partiers and those in between.   This doesn't need to be another fight, pitting conservatives against liberals.  Nearly everyone agrees things look grim.  If we work together as Americans, everyone will be better for it, especially the USA!

Be a Part of the Solution

Recently I've heard a lot of everyday Americans ponder the question: What can I do to help the unemployed.  There's a good chance that if you're reading this post you are either unemployed or know someone who is.  If you ARE employed and have friends or family members who are unemployed, you likely feel powerless and frustrated seeing your loved ones go through such difficult times.

So, what can you do to help?  I have a few suggestions that do not take a whole lot of effort on your part, but could make a huge impact.

If you live in Chicago, I'd like you to check out the Chicago Career Tech website.  I learned about this organization a few months ago via a WGN news segment.  Being unemployed myself, I contacted them and went through the process.  I'm happy to announce that I've been accepted into their program to earn a certificate in Social Media Marketing! 

The organization offers certification courses (at many city colleges and other accredited institutions) and the chance to work hands-on with a company in the target field to prepare to re-enter the job market with improved, updated skills.  What an opportunity! 

So what can you do?  Well, while you may not be a decision-maker at your organization, you CAN pass this site along to your manager or HR department and encourage them to become a partner with CCT.  It's an amazing and positive PR opportunity for your company to be one of the few being a part of the solution to our terrible unemployment situation in our country!

Unemployed and Counting...

In my previous post I discussed my loss of employment in the heart of one of the toughest economic downturns the country has seen in more than a half-century.  It came at the beginning of a presidency filled with hope and change.

Fast forward ten months from Inauguration Day to October 2009.  This is when the situation began to go from bad to worse.

Despite my reluctance, I filed for unemployment benefits in April.  Meantime, nearly every temp agency I signed up with was inundated with applicants and short on assignments, so 'stop gap' measures grew more difficult.  Worse, every resume submitted was either ignored or responded to with a rejection letter.  Things were looking grim.

What's more, as my nest egg dwindled, I increasingly worried about my ability to pay my mortgage.  President Obama passed the Making Homes Affordable program in March 2009 and banks, including mine--Chase--began accepting applications in April. 

Going into this, I wasn't looking to the banks to do this gratis, and I didn't expect the bank to lose money on me either.  Simply put, I was looking to stretch out my savings in case this bout of unemployment lasted longer than expected.  My hope was that the interest rate could be lowered which, in turn, would lower my monthly payment; The bank would still make a profit off of me, just not as much.

From the beginning of the process (April 2009), advisors from Chase informed me to continue paying my mortgage because it would better my chances of being approved for the MHA program.   From April until October--when I finally received a decision--they repeatedly requested additional paperwork that was not part of the requirements, asked for resubmissions because they 'lost' my information or claimed they never received information (despite "successful" fax receipts).  What a bureaucratic nightmare!  Nevertheless, was told all along that my chances were good given my excellent credit rating and superb history of paying my mortgage on time.

To my surprise the letter arrived and stated that I was not eligible for the program because my situation was not of a permanent nature.  More specifically, they stated that unemployment was not of a permanent nature.  Hopefully not, but it was clear that the President and Congress passed this legislation to help those who were finding themselves in a long-term unemployment situation.

Wow...now what?  I wasn't going to take this lying down.  I jumped through their hoops and I followed the rules and according to Congress, I qualified for this assistance!  The media would have a field day with this...and I was just the one to tell them!

(please forgive the background noise of a friend giggling at various spots during the story)

My story continues here...

The Conversation Begins today

Welcome to my new blog!  I’m really excited to begin a conversation with everyone.  There may be times we don’t agree, and we’ll try to persuade the other of our argument.  Some reasons will be compelling and might move one or both of us in a different direction, but we’ll always remain respectful to one another.  A vigorous debate is always fun, but it should always remain respectful.  Disagreeing in itself is not disrespectful, it’s the manner in which we disagree that can be.

So what is this conversation’s subject?  Well, it’s mainly about shame and how to unlearn much of what we have learned through social cues that stop us in our tracks, or paralyze us so much that we can’t move forward.  Have you been unemployed?  Gone through foreclosure?  Bankruptcy?  Divorce?  Coming out to your family and friends?  The list goes on…
If you have experienced any of life’s challenges listed above, you’re sure to have encountered judgements and statements that, when analyzed, clearly have a negative connotation to them.  Here are just a few:

• People who are unemployed are just lazy.  They only need to apply for jobs and they’d have one!
• Filing for bankruptcy is for losers and those who mooch off the system!
• I can’t believe all those people who don’t pay their mortgage payment!  What?  Do they think they should live for free?!
• Well, people shouldn’t get divorced.  Divorce means they didn’t work hard enough on their marriage.

These statements come with a lot of judgement and can change the way we view ourselves, often negatively, which is not at all useful while we are going through a rough patch.

So what do I know about this?  What makes me an expert?  Well, like many of you, I’ve become a poster child for the Great Recession.  Despite my Master of Arts degree, over 10 years of work experience, bilingual speaking abilities (French/English) and many more talents, I lost my job in January 2009.  At the time, I had a credit score in the mid 800s, very low credit card debt and more than $10,000 in savings.  What happened next was something I never expected at the age of 32.

I would spend 22 months unemployed, having sent out hundreds of resumes, attending networking events, career fairs and the like.  I would lose my condo to foreclosure and consequently file for bankruptcy.  If that wasn’t enough, after landing a great job, the company hit financial troubles 6 short months after my arrival and I would lose my job again! 

During this round, I faced an IRS audit and a huge debacle with the State unemployment office that put me on the hook for thousands of dollars, despite THEIR errors!  Indeed, this recession has been “great” and caused much depression for many.

Through it, however, I found patches of hope, happiness and harmony.

So, this blog will chronicle some of the adversity I faced.  It will also be a place I post and discuss interesting topics surrounding shame and how we, as Americans, view ourselves as a result of what we are ‘taught’ by our culture.  It will also be a place to talk about how to reframe that shame.  The judgements and opinions of others will never go away; it’s embedded in our culture, but we can find ways to over come them and move forward with peace in ourselves.

Let the discussion begin…